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The second passage of the three that address the duties of husbands and
wives together is Colossians 3:18-19. God says to wives, "Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord." This short text briefly reinforces what we have just seen in Ephesians, using
the same word hupotasso, and adds that such submission on the part of the wife, though contrary to the way of the world, is wonderfully appropriate when viewed in the context of her relationship with the Lord.
Looking at life from a feministic perspective, presuming the absence of an interested God, preferring a god who is not actively engaged with and attentive to his creation, or one who is unwise, or uncaring, perhaps then one might
find -- as most do -- some dark motivation to conclude that such submission in the home is unhealthy and inappropriate. Presuming that men and women have no spiritual nature, that their differences are not rooted in the spiritual
realm as well as in the physical, and deliberately ignoring all known facts relating to marriage... being wilfully blind to the fact that the principles expressed here work wonderfully and with exceptional consistency in
marriage... then certainly, one finds no warrant whatsoever for accepting marital roles as God has evidently defined them. When a woman thus disdains the order of God in the home and culture, she not only destroys
her marriage, church, and family... she witnesses loudly to her rejection of divine order, of divine principle, and of divine authority. She flaunts, as a rebellious generation against the divine hand, a blatant stubborn blasphemy
in her life and words that drowns any other witness to the living God she might attempt. Any woman who does so while claiming Christ gives great occasion to the enemies of the Lord to blaspheme.
However, it is "in the Lord " that a wife's submissive disposition is found superbly fitting... appropriate. In the Lord, a woman's obedience to her husband brings temporal blessing that extends into the
spiritual realms. When a wife finally moves beyond herself, not walking in obedience merely because it works
for her, but taking in the symbolic importance of her role in the home, she becomes a living picture of spiritual reality. A woman who is living in
the Lord, who lives out the truth of the divine headship of God over Christ, and the divine headship of Christ over the Church, will naturally also find it a pleasure to see this picture extended into the natural realm in the headship of Man over Woman, and more specifically in the headship of husband over wife. She will not find marital subjection to be appalling or distasteful, but a thing of beauty and wonder. It will move her more to worship than disgust.
Yes, it is fitting for a wife to be a living picture and example of the submission of the Church to God, and by her example to encourage all men and women to submit themselves similarly to the LORD God. In fact,
there is no other picture in the cosmos of this divine relationship to replace the wife should she fail in her duty. In accepting her role symbolically, she puts on display for the world, for angels and for men (1 Cor 4:9) her
selfless devotion to her husband for God's sake, reminding all of God's authority in her life and of her respect for God's authority in her husband, bringing both God and her husband great honor.
The last passage to consider that addresses mutual responsibility in marriage is 1st
Peter 3:1-7. The first six verses of this text explicitly address the wife's demeanor in her marriage in much the same way that Ephesians emphasizes the husband's role and disposition. This text is not often used as a key text in developing concepts of marital responsibility, even though this is the most penetrating section found anywhere in the Bible pertaining to the wife's role. It is, in fact, entirely undermined by the likes of J. Vernon McGee, who claims the text contains no command to wives, but rather is "voluntary..." sort of... suggestions from God. (
Notes and Outlines: 1 Peter) Once explored in depth, perhaps it will become apparent why this particular text is so troubling to feminists. 1. Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any
First, note carefully the use of the word, "likewise," introducing the above text. The reference takes us back to an earlier text in the midst of the second chapter: 1st
Peter 2:18-20. As God introduces the principles of obedience and subjection for the wife in using the word "likewise," God is saying that the submission of the wife to her husband, her subjection to him, is similar in some respects to the subjection evident in another relationship.
18. Servants, be subject to your masters with all fear; not only to the good The submission of the
wife to her husband, her subjection to him, is in essence very similar to the submission of a servant to a master. As we have seen, this is not inconsistent with our definition of the word "subjection," or with its use in
other biblical contexts, or with the general teaching of the Word of God. The concept of subjection generally implies being under the explicit and formal control of another, placing us in the context of dominion and authority and
being much stronger than merely deferring to the interests and disposition of another. The word "likewise" at the beginning of chapter three suggests that the wife should submit to her husband with
a disposition akin to a godly male servant's submission to his master, and this manner is very carefully explained here in the second chapter. The two texts in chapters two and three are intimately linked in proximity and in
content: both texts encourage the hearer to "be subject to" their "master" in a fearful and respectful way. Certainly, there is much more to the relationship between a wife and her husband than
that between a common servant and a master, but there are apparently fundamental similarities as well... especially if the concept of servanthood is understood properly in its ancient setting. This relationship was not a license
for one person to recklessly abuse another, and it did not ever connote inherent inferiority or diminished personal value in the servant; it was a common relationship retaining basic human dignity and mutual equality. It was
similar in some respects to employer-employee relationships today, but explicit ownership by the master and his right to use corporal punishment were embedded in the economy of servanthood. Essentially, the concept
of servanthood implies one person's ownership of another's time, talent, and strength. The servant's ultimate purpose is to minister to and advance his or her master... just as servants of Jesus Christ are dedicated to Him. For
earthly servants, service to the master is equivalent to service to Jesus Christ. (Col 3:22-4) The exhortation given to servants in 1st
Peter 2, that they be subject to their masters with fearful respect, is repeated to wives in their conduct with their husbands in chapter 3. Both common servants and wives are encouraged by God Himself to walk in fearful reverence to and be explicitly obedient to their masters regardless of their master's disposition. Sarah, God's model for a wife in her conduct in her home, accepted this role of servanthood, acknowledging her husband Abraham as her master, and walked faithfully in it.
The extent to
which a wife should submit to an unreasonable man is partially developed in this context. As servants are to be subject to their masters with all fear, even when they are unjustly physically punished, in the same manner and to the
same degree wives are to be subject to their own husbands in all things. This is the natural implication of the word "likewise" introducing this text, theoretically comparing the duties of wives and servants while plainly
calling servants to patiently endure unjust physical suffering. In between the texts we have considered here in 1st
Peter, we also find the example of Jesus Christ as He set the standard for all believers in being willing to suffer for righteousness sake. How far did our Lord, our Example, go in His obedience to God? "For even hereunto
were ye called: because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that ye should follow his steps: Who did no sin, neither was guile found in his mouth: Who, when he was reviled, reviled not again; when he suffered, he
threatened not; but committed himself to him that judgeth righteously:" (1 Peter 2:21-25) Our Lord went to the cross for us, suffering fierce injustice in all humility and patience. He uses His own example to encourage
servants to render due obedience to their masters even when treated most unjustly. How far should a godly wife go in yielding to her husband for the sake of Him Who died for her? We dwell here for a moment to find some context to
the extent to which a wife should continue in subjection to her husband when he is less than he should be. As servants are to be subject to their masters with all fear, even when they are unjustly punished, in the
same manner and to the same degree wives are to be subject to their own husbands. The limit established by God is when the abuse actually results in some permanent disfigurement: the wife is maimed in some way, or when the abuse is
malicious, arbitrary or wanton. In such cases it is appropriate for proper civil authority to end the relationship and set the woman free from her husband. (Additional detail on the topic of divorce can be found in the article
Dear daughter of Abraham, when your husband errs, do not correct him – that is God's work, not yours. "If any obey not the word, they also may without the
word be won by the conversation of the wives." This text speaks to the general manner of persuasion that you are to use with your husband. If your husband is an unbeliever, you are to seek to win him to
faith in Christ and to obedience to Christ through your own godly example. It is not generally with your tongue that you are to win your husband to righteousness, it is with a godly behavior that is so holy, so reverent, and so
chaste that it catches his attention, draws his interest, and wins his admiration. The power of a woman's tongue is profound. God's Word makes many references to it, and illustrates its devastating power in extremes
(Pr 12:4, 27:15-16, 21:19, 30:23, Ecc 7:26). Death and life are in the power of your tongue, dear sister. God records men being vexed nearly to death under its lethal tortures. (Judges 16:16) You are forbidden to use your
expressive powers to correct your husband and manipulate him. Your influence of him is to be, "without the word." You are to use your behavior and example, not your words, to win your husband to righteousness. As this principle applies to a wife in relation to an unbelieving husband, so it does as well to the wife of a believer. The principle of godly submission applies still – do not think that once your husband comes to
Christ that you are free to chide him. "And they that have believing masters, let them not despise them, because they are brethren; but rather do them service, because they are faithful and beloved, partakers of the benefit.
These things teach and exhort." (1 Tim 6:2) If it be true that you are to respect an unbelieving man, how much more so when your husband is also a joint-heir with you in Christ! If your husband is disobedient
or careless, your duty is to pray for him and to seek to win him over to wisdom and obedience through your own chaste and fearful conduct. Your reverent subjection to your husband, your godly fear of his authority, your
chaste modesty, your holy manner of life, are to be so genuine, so unique, so compelling that your husband's heart is won over to obedience to Christ without so much as a word from you. Certainly, there will be times when a
respectful appeal is appropriate, and with God's wisdom in your quietness, your husband will certainly come to know and value the helpfulness of your counsel. But he should never feel pressed by you, never harassed, never
afflicted, never domineered… Never. Given God's guidelines for divorce and separation, and God's stated expectation that you be in subjection
to your husband within these guidelines, I suppose it goes without saying that your husband should not be afraid of you, should never find a trace of sharpness in your tongue, no shadow of betrayal or disrespect in your heart. He should never feel disdain nor resentment from you in public or in private in the slightest, more than any master should tolerate from his servant, or what Jesus Christ should endure from His Church.
Though you are much, much more than a mere servant to your husband -- you are his friend, confidant, lover, and dear companion... indeed, you are
one flesh with him! -- yet there is nothing about your closeness to your husband that gives you liberty to molest his heart. While it is quite common today for women to correct, contend with, rebuke, and chide their husbands over the most paltry things, in public and in private, your husband should find this strange when he hears of it. It should not be something he is ever threatened by, or even considers.
The solid loyalty of your heart toward your husband should be unquestioned, passionate, and immovable for the sake of Jesus Christ. It is not that your husband is perfect, or that he does not make mistakes, or that
he does not badly miss the mark at times, or that he need deserve this type of honorable treatment from you. He need not act in a becoming way or deserve this place in his home in any degree, any more than you must deserve
his love and provision for you. Truly, you are not trying to earn anything from your husband in your service to him, nor should you demand a reward from him for your work beyond your basic necessities. If you do,
anything you receive will be your only reward, and his failure to give you what you demand will merely cause resentment, bitterness, and contention. No, your only motive in this is to please your Heavenly Father, and you are
content with His purpose in you, His provision for you, and His pleasure in you. When you fail your husband, repent and make it right with him at whatever level the offense. If it were in the privacy of your own
heart that you moved against him, keep that between yourself and your God and turn from it in sober prayer. If it were in his absence but involved the children, make sure they are fully aware of your repentance and contrition. If
it were with your husband openly, ask his forgiveness and tell him your grief over your sin as soon as you are ware of it. If he comes to you with a grievance over something that escaped your notice, listen with all patience and
tender humility to salve an offense or purge a misunderstanding. If it were, God forbid, a public embarrassment of your husband or an open defiance of him in some manner, seek and follow his will in how you should resolve it, and
submit yourself to his correction with all meekness. If your husband is disobedient or careless, your duty is to pray for him and to seek to win him over to wisdom and obedience through your own chaste and fearful
demeanor. It is God's job to formally correct him, and God may not choose to use your example in doing so. It is possible that God may not correct him at all in this life, and leave his judgment for the next. Certainly, there will
be times when a respectful appeal is appropriate from you, as Sarah fervently appealed to Abraham in the matter of Ishmael (Gen 21:10). However, let it be seldom that your advice is unsolicited, and often that your prayers are
silent ones. It goes without saying, clearly, that your husband should never feel pressed by you, never harassed, never afflicted, never controlled, never dominated. As your husband observes your walk with
Christ, rather than feeling threatened by you, or harassed, or domineered, he should, "behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear." (1 Pet 3:2) There should be a carefulness and a caution about you
concerning your relationship with your husband that is obvious to him. This fearful reverence does not mean that you cannot be warm and intimate as a lover and a friend, but it certainly implies that any froward, presumptuous or
contentious spirit must find no place in you at all. First, you are naturally expected to be chaste. If you are a believer, God is moving you toward cleanliness, sexual purity in mind and body. You are to be
discrete, modest, and altogether faithful to your husband. A godly wife gives her husband no cause whatsoever to doubt her purity or the reservation of her love and affection for him alone. Do not discover your physical beauty to
another; do not dress yourself in a provocative manner in public, to draw the attention of other men to yourself, yet do not hide yourself from your husband or refuse to open yourself to him when the two of you are alone. Dress in
a way that is attractive to your husband and according to his pleasure, but not sensuously before the eyes of other men. Your chaste appearance must be the outward evidence of an inward chastity in soul and heart.
The modest exterior will only be a delight to your God and your husband if it expresses the essence of who you are. Couple this chastity with godly fear. As we have seen, fear is a primary quality that you are to
develop. This is a godly reverence, a gentle quiet submissiveness. It is not a dread, an outright terror or an unhealthy fear, but one that avoids your husband's displeasure, understands his authority and rule in the household and
seeks his favor. Are there areas of your husband's home where you have contentiously usurped his authority? any area at all where your husband dare not move freely without your consent? God forbid! Would you dare
treat your Lord Jesus Christ in this manner? Would you contemptuously forbid God's control in any area of His home? require His consent? oppress Him with your self-will? pierce and wound
Him with an unholy tongue? I think not. Do you regularly fashion your agenda without your husband, setting your own priorities and going your own way? Do you not blush at the thought of reprimanding the man God
has set over you, if in fact you have ever done so? Do you not grieve at the thought of arguing with him? of resisting him? Of telling him you are too busy to do as he wishes, or that you have other things planned and cannot meet
his request? Or even oppressing him and wounding him when you cannot make him cater to your own pleasure? This type of behavior is entirely unacceptable: "Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the
least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me." (Matt 25:40) If in any way you have grown callous or disrespectful toward your husband, seek the infusion of the fear, meekness and quietness of the Holy Spirit again
from the Father, which is in His sight of great price. Order your heart and spirit continually before the Father of Lights and let Him fill you with the joy of obedience. Do not be found trampling under foot the Son of God. In your servanthood, your attitude
should be chaste, obedient, and deeply respectful to your husband: "chaste conversation coupled with fear… a meek and quiet spirit." So far from a sharp and condescending tongue, a Christian wife puts on and adorns
herself with "the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price." (1 Pet 3:4) To be meek
is to "endure injury patiently and without resentment." (Webster) This is a mildness of manner that makes you difficult to offend, such that you are not easily wounded and hurt in spirit. While women of the world are frequently distressed, discontent, hurt, angry, and quarrelsome... it is not to be so with you.
A godly woman adorns herself with a holy respect, a godly quietness, a deep sense of the authority and dignity of her husband. Your attitude should be one of cooperative and patient love, humble service, and quiet
submission in all things: a "quiet spirit." It is a calmness of spirit, one that is not easily undone or unsettled, but one that trusts in the sovereign protection of God generally provided in and through her husband. As
it is rooted in the spirit and in the heart, it also affects the tongue. A woman's tongue is an instrument of great power and a righteous woman will use it with discretion and holiness (Jas 1:26). It is not that
you should not speak with your husband freely, for you are very likely more prone to words than he, but you must be deliberate and edifying in your conversation with him. This is so contrary to mindless chatter and verbiage, as you
have been oft told is natural and healthy for you. It is as true for you as it is for men, that "in the multitude of words there wanteth not sin, but he that refraineth his lips is wise." (Pr 10:19) "Be swift to
hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath." (Jas 1:19). Learn to control your tongue, and only speak in a manner that will be edifying to your husband, that you may minister grace to him. (Eph 4:29) It is in this
manner, with a meek and quiet spirit, that you are to adorn yourself. Not with gold, pearls, and costly array. You are to be much more concerned with your inward beauty than the outward, adorning yourself with obedience,
self-control, and holy quietness. There is no cause for you to put these graces off, but persevere in them day by day by the grace and power of God. In your manner, you are not to be loud and confrontational, you must not be brazen and impudent, you cannot be
assertive and aggressive and boisterously talkative or constantly chattering. It is true, your meekness dons a remarkable beauty: "shamefacedness." Women are to, "adorn themselves in modest apparel, with
shamefacedness and sobriety." (1 Tim 2:9) What is this thing: shamefacedness? It is a concept completely lost to our adulterous and sinful generation. The basic idea, taken simply from a dictionary, is a
blushed and tender countenance, as though moved to sober, reverent quietness in the presence of a superior. It appears only here and in Hebrews 12:28-9 where it is translated reverence, "Let us have grace, whereby we may serve
God acceptably with reverence
and godly fear: for our God is a consuming fire." It is akin to the concept of shame, but need not convey a sense of guilt or necessarily of inferiority. It carries with it an awesomeness, as one perceives in this text in Hebrews, where Moses says, "I exceedingly fear and quake," in reference to God's voice shaking earth and heaven. The awesome majesty and splendor of our God, the terror of His power, this will put a blush upon the countenance of every saint of God and hold them speechless and trembling in His holy presence. This is shamefacedness. It will be moved in Woman due to the divine purpose and order in the roles given to Man and Woman, and will spring from a sense of reverence for God's order and His ways.
Shamefacedness is the opposite of careless confidence, of intrusive presumption, of bold familiarity, of confrontational effrontery. It is the blush of queen Esther as she stands before her king, her husband, and
awaits the golden scepter to spare her life for an unsolicited approach to regal authority. It is the meekness of John the Baptist, the greatest mortal born of woman, as he cries out in bewilderment, "
I have need to be baptized of thee, and comest thou to me?" (Matt 3:14) It is what we feel in the presence of a holy God when He has lifted the veil of our sinfulness, when we cry with Isaiah, "Woe is me, for I am
undone! I am a man of unclean lips, and I dwell in the midst of a people of unclean lips!" (Is 6:5) It is the humble cry of the perfectly obedient servant, "
I am unprofitable, I have merely done that which was my duty to do." (Lk 17:10) It is the blush of the publican, who would not so much as lift his eyes to heaven, but cried out, "God be merciful to me a sinner!
" (Lk 18:13) It is the blush of the woman of God. This puts an end to the manipulative glare, to the bitter word, to the cutting tongue that women so frequently use to carve their way through life. It brings
an end to the froward complaint, the relentless resistance, and the stubborn opposition of the impudent, shameless will of feminism. Shamefacedness is not a mask, not a façade, but the widow to a holy heart, a heart that is broken
and contrite, faithful and loving, gentle and meek, quiet, pure, submissive, and genuine. This, my dear sister, is in the sight of God of great price. Of what singular beauty is such a shamefaced woman to God? What is it about a godly woman that is so exceedingly
precious to Him? This phrase, "of great price," is itself a precious and rare one in the Word of God. It is found descriptive only of three other things in God's Word and all are inanimate: the precious ointment with
which Mary anointed the head and feet of Jesus Christ (Mk 14:3, John 12;3), the expensive jewelry which women cherish and with which they adorn themselves (1 Tim 2:9), and the unique pearl "of great price" found by the
merchantman seeking goodly pearls. (Matt 13:46) A meek and quiet spirit in a godly woman ranks with these? Yes, it does! Is it then something to be loathed and hated? Is not this an exceedingly precious and practical topic we
consider? What brings the God of heaven more delight than a quiet, godly woman, walking in subjection to her husband? Does He delight in what he sees in our homes today? Oh, that wives would carefully follow after this holiness in
our homes to bring delights to the heart of God! It is in this type of quiet submission that the godly women of old, "adorned themselves, being in subjection to their own husbands." There was no
different expectation placed upon wives under the old economy than there is now in the new. What God commends in our godly female heritage He looks for in every wife today. He looks to find each one, "being in subjection"
(again, hupotasso). These women of ancient times, "trusted in God," and this is what enabled them to continue in such a godly walk, a walk of subjection that is so precious in the sight of
God. They did this in a day when women were bought and sold, when Woman was discounted and belittled. How much more should women of today be willing to walk after God, when the culture is so very much disposed to protecting them
and seeing to their welfare! What makes it so very difficult for any woman to walk in holiness in her home is fear, an ungodly fear, a lack of trust in God. There was more to fear in Sarah's day, more discomfort to
shrink from, more danger facing her than facing most any woman today. What can we see by looking closely at her life? Any casual reading of the life of Abraham, mixed with the slightest bit of imagination, places
one next to the sturdy heart of Sarah in the windy sands of the Arabian Desert. God called her husband, in his seventies or eighties, to leave everything they knew, and to venture out into the wilderness... with no certain
provision, no protection, no map... and no particular destination in mind. Abraham left, with little more than his tent and his sheep, to wander in a strange land, a strange culture... never to return home to Ur. Sarah left her
home, her extended family, her friends, her natural security. She left all she knew and felt comfort in, for the sands and transience of being a nomad... merely because her husband said so. Whenever her husband was
minded, she would have to pull up the stakes again, pack up the tent again, get her things in order again, and climb back up on some cranky camel or donkey and ride along beside him. She would have to cook out in the open, fighting
the blowing sands, the cold and heat, preparing and cleaning and managing a household that was constantly on the move. She would have little of the common comforts of this life... all because her husband said so... and for no other
reason. Abraham did not know where he was going, he had no agenda to accomplish when he got there, and he knew no one along the way. He simply said God had called him to leave the extended family and go. She went
with him... and we have no indication that she complained as she did. Sarah was a very beautiful woman. Should any king or captain see her, or any searching scouts return with a report of her to one, he would want
her... and be willing to kill to have her. It was a dangerous time. There were no police, no secure borders. Roving bands of malicious criminals and pirates marauded and pillaged innocent travelers all the time. Kings did as they
pleased with those that passed their way. What would Abraham do? How would he take care of her? What would happen to them? God would have to watch over them. She would have to trust Him. She did. Was
it easy? Well, Sarah was so beautiful that when anyone important asked Abraham about her, he just said she was his sister... and asked Sarah to go along with it. She did... hoping it would all work out OK... she was
his half-sister. Abraham was afraid; he was not trusting God, he thought he was saving his own life by doing this. Once, a mighty foreign king took Abraham's word on this and offered him a lot of money for Sarah.
Abraham felt he could not refuse and risk exposing his lie. He sold his dear Sarah to be another man's wife. He did this deliberately and purposefully and completely and permanently... and waved her good-bye. How
did Sarah deal with this vast failure of her husband? Her husband that was following God and taking her about in the desert all this time? I don't have any clue. Was God faithful?
Yes. God was faithful. God plagued the house of this king severely because of the presence of Sarah within it, eventually revealing to the king the true nature of his problem by supernatural means since neither Abraham nor Sarah
were willing to expose the lie. The king put Sarah back into her home with Abraham, and he rebuked Abraham for his lie... and Sarah as well. Sarah got settled back in her home, and forgave her husband.
Then along came another king... and Abraham sold his lovely wife again. And God rescued her again. Neither husband ever touched her... in God's beautiful providence... and Sarah eventually became a
mother... after many painful years of waiting and wondering and hoping... she became the mother of the child of promise. God never said it would be easy. He just said that He is the same yesterday, today, and
forever. God is faithful, Who has called you unto the fellowship of His Son, Jesus Christ our Lord. Obey Him. Trust Him. He is worthy of your trust. Let us notice a striking -- and most often overlooked -- facet of the
conduct of the Christian wife; "Even as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord." In the national bestseller, Power of A Praying Husband, in her chapter on Her Submission, Stormie
O'Martian claims that the Bible never uses the word "obey" in the context of a wife's submission to her husband (p. 99). She is very plain and sweeping in her insistence that God never intended for "obedience"
to have any place at all in defining the marriage relationship and she centers her entire work upon the exclusion of this concept (her book would have to be completely rewritten to accommodate it)... and she apparently has the
unqualified endorsement of the most influential conservative evangelical leaders of our day. Doesn't it make you wonder... just a little? We read for ourselves... as so few apparently
do. Abraham gave commands to Sarah and Sarah obeyed Abraham. It was not unrighteous for him to give his wife commands, and God was delighted in Abraham for the way he commanded his household. (Gen 18:19) When Abraham told Sarah to
quickly prepare bread for some guests (Gen 18:6), during one of their many stops in their relentless journey, she did so. Abraham did not explain why he needed this, nor did Sarah ask. He did not ask her if it was convenient, seek
her permission or her will in the matter, nor did he make sure he was not interrupting some other work she had planned for the day. He did not apologize for the short notice, nor make any excuses for needing to order her life. She
promptly obeyed him. It was clear to both Abraham and Sarah that Abraham owned all of Sarah's time; Abraham's priorities had become Sarah's priorities. She regularly confirmed that she had given her life to him and
for him, and he trusted her. She was an extension of him; they were one. She did not resist, hesitate, or even question her husband when he called her to the task, any more than his own arm or leg would have so done; knowledge of
her lord's will was clear and became her own. Sarah often reminded Abraham that her life was dedicated to him, and encouraged him to use it as he saw fit in the Lord. She did this by calling him, "Lord."
Sarah addressed Abraham as her master, as her lord in this life, acknowledging him as the one she was devoted to serve and obey. Her husband's desire and will was her duty before God, so long as it was not openly contrary to the
direct commands of God. When she called him "Lord," she was saying to him in so many words, "At your service." Sarah reminded Abraham and herself of this principle when she addressed him, and
also when she spoke of him to others. When speaking to the Lord Himself about her husband, she naturally referred to her own husband as, "my lord." (Gen 18:12) Her own will and desire were not the overriding concern in
her relationship with her husband, any more than it was between her and her God. She saw that in God's order, her service to her husband and her service to the God of Creation were one and the same. She was dead to herself and to
her own way, looking to her earthly master for leadership and direction in the matter of raising his child of promise, faithful to him in guiding the affairs of his home, and she honored him when representing him to others, both
within the home and without. You are encouraged to do the same. Was this something that was particularly easy for Sarah for some reason? Sarah likely knew her husband Abraham as well as or better than any woman can
know her husband. She was not only his wife, she was his half-sister and ten years the younger. She had known him and lived with him for as long as she could remember. If any woman might resent and resist submission, it might be a
woman married to her elder half-brother. If any would find familiarity a difficulty, be tempted to disrespect, resent, belittle, and resist her husband, it might such a woman. If any woman would resist calling her husband,
"lord," we actually might have a good candidate in Sarah. Certainly, it is clear that Sarah's example to you in addressing her husband as "lord" does not necessarily represent an explicit
command from God. God is not saying you are required to call your husband "lord." Similarly, the Word of God does not command
a husband to tell his wife that he loves her, and to tell her often and affectionately that she is the most important person in the world to him. Yet any husband that resents doing so exposes a severe heart problem in following Jesus Christ, for Jesus Christ certainly expresses His love for the Church in this way.
If following the example of Sarah in calling your own husband, "Lord," brings grief to you, as with any hard-hearted husband who will not communicate love appropriately to his wife, your difficulty
likewise exposes you as the rebel, like an unbroken horse or as the mule, which will not yield to the bit and the saddle, stiff-necked and rebellious, saying, "I will not have this man to reign over me." (Lk 19:14) Don't
be this way. (Ps 32:9) This is casting off the rule of your heavenly Father in your life, saying, "My lips are my own, who is lord over me?" (Ps12:4) As a wife you are encouraged by Sarah's example to
develop the regular habit of addressing your husband as your lord and master. This is entirely consistent and appropriate for you to do in following God's command
that you be in subjection to your husband and that you reverence, or fear
him. It is equivalent to a husband giving consistent verbal affirmation to his wife that he loves and cherishes her in obedience to God's command that he love his wife as Christ loves the Church. In the same spirit, call your husband "Lord" as often as you call him "Honey" or "Sweety" or "Sugar" or any other nickname you are fond of using. Call him "Sir;" call him "Boss;" call him "Master." Find frequent use of addresses and titles that confirm to him you are working for him, that you are at his service, that you respect him and the position he holds, that you are seeking his welfare, and that you are committed to helping him, ministering to him, and pleasing him in every way possible.
When you verbally and thoughtfully acknowledge your husband as your lord you do several things. You probe the purity and tenderness of your own heart, ensuring that you are walking in the way of obedience, checking
your self-will and unmasking and exposing the subtle encroachments of sin. You also encourage your husband in his leadership in the home, and you assure him of your loving loyalty and respect. You bolster his confidence, and enable
him in the work God has called him to, and you remind him of your selfless devotion to him, that you remain at his disposal, by his side, naturally drawing out his appreciation and thankfulness to you and to God for your open
subjection to the Gospel of Christ. We also have here in Sarah's example an explicit reference to the formal state of the wife in regard to her servanthood. This word translated lord is kurios, the
same word used to refer to the Lord Jesus Christ throughout the New Testament. It means supreme in authority, controller. (Strong) It is translated God (Acts 19:20) and Lord
(approx 600 times in the NT). It is translated masters: "And, ye masters, do the same things unto them, forbearing threatening: knowing that your Master
also is in heaven." (Eph 6:9) In calling her husband lord, Sarah was formally acknowledging her husband as her master and accepting the place of a servant in his house. In this she was respecting divine order and
following God's pattern for the home. This order was established before the Law, when Sarah Lived, and is expressed as the pattern of godliness now in the Day of the Gentile, in the Age of Grace, after the fulfilling of the Law. It
applies to every married woman in every age. When a woman gives her life to serving the Lord Jesus Christ in her home like this, not only is it an unspeakable delight to the heart of God, also, in all but the
foulest of men, this type of quiet subjection will draw out a profound gratitude and thankfulness. Your obedience to God will very likely cause your husband to naturally cherish you as his most precious earthly treasure, and result
in abundant overflows of thanksgiving to God. Render him the respect and service that our Lord calls you to render unto him, as unto Christ Himself. Remind your husband and yourself frequently that you are a willing servant to him,
calling him lord for the sake of the Lord Jesus Christ. This walk of obedient faith, where the husband leads in wisdom and love, and where you follow in quietness, subjection and love, is how the two of you
are designed to function. When two walk together in this way there is profound beauty, satisfaction, and health. Walking outside of this way, especially when the wife does, brings conflict, shame, and a reproach: women are to be,
"good, obedient unto their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed." (Titus 2:5) When a married woman claims to belong to Jesus Christ and is not generally fearfully
obedient to her husband the Word of God is blasphemed. That is why it is so important for older women to be a godly example in their subjection to their own husbands, both in word and deed. Elder women are to, "
teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed." (Titus 2:4-5) When this foundation of divine order in the home is destroyed in the church the Word of God is discredited in the world. Domestic disobedience is an open testimony to the world of a practical rejection of the
authority of God over the church, and this broadly proclaims an open, public rebellion against His principles. When the church does this it brings God great dishonor and robs the kingdom of God of its innate power, as when Israel
went a whoring after the gods of the nations about them and learned their wickedness. Satan goes after this end, this goal, seeking it with a relentless, deliberate, constant vengeance. He wants to have the Word of
God blasphemed legitimately and viciously. There is little that can accomplish this like rebellion in God's own people. That is evidently one reason why there is such a common rage against the truth here, against the principle of
divine order in the home, especially within the walls of our churches, and why it is so very important for saints to repent, and become obedient and faithful to the Lord in this matter. It is absolutely essential that we
internalize these truths and teach them to others who look to us as mentors. Any time that a wife purposes to violate the authority of her husband, she opens the door of her life and home to demonic invasion just
as if she were to resist any other duly appointed authority in her life. Whether we understand it or not, the principles of the kingdom of God are rooted in God's order, and godly authority is intrinsic to His order. Civil
authority, parental authority, and spiritual authority in the church are commonly developed as areas where saints should remain in respectful submission so that they will be protected from attack and devastation by the enemy. It is
in the key area of marriage that authority as been crushed by feminism and the church silenced, leaving consistent open access to demonic invasion of the Christian home. In restoring this order to the church and home, we close the
doors to satanic access. The enemy will not retreat easily. In my opinion, one of the main reasons that the Word of God is mocked in western society is the refusal of professing Christian women to walk in obedience
to God in their homes, and the refusal of nearly all professing Christians to say or do anything about it. The relationship of obedience to God's ordained authority in marriage to the health of both the home and society is clear,
but this text brings to light the fact that disobedience in the home significantly impacts the health and effectiveness of the very kingdom of God. When God's Word is being legitimately blasphemed in the world, it is because the
kingdom of God is effectively paralyzed. Only the children of God can wreck such havok on the kingdom... because it is chaos from within. Truly, the gates of hell cannot withstand the attack of the kingdom of God... but it need not
worry about a kingdom in disarray, boasting an army that cannot find its hands. (Ps 76:5) Disobedient saints are not a threat to the darkness: they are its most powerful friends. This is not a peripheral, academic
subject that we are neglecting as a church, as the living body of Christ upon the earth. The subjection of the wife to the husband deeply affects the very foundation of our temporal existence and of God's spiritual kingdom. We do
not well to stand by in silence as feminism mangles the foundations of all that we hold dear. This concept is so central in the design of God that He actually associates it with salvation. The text we have before us here implies that only so long as a
woman generally continues in what many would consider to be this deeply unhealthy submission in her home… should she even consider herself to be a Christian at all… "whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well."
It is not that a wife need earn her salvation by being subject to her husband, but it is a simple plain fact that any true saint of God is... Is there room for error in a Christian? There most certainly is. Is
there room for blatant, persistent, willful, prolonged, deliberate rebellion against the principles of God as a manner of life? No, there is not room for defiant rebellion. Such sinners are not of the Lord's sheep, for, as our Lord
said, His children, "hear my voice, and I known them, and they follow me." (John 10:27) "But unto them that are contentious and do not obey the truth, but obey unrighteousness," is the reward of
"indignation and wrath, tribulation and anguish." (Rom 2: 8-9) "Let no man deceive you: he that doeth righteousness is righteous, even as He is righteous. He that committeth sin is of the devil... In
this the children of God are manifest, and the children of the devil: whosoever doeth not righteousness is not of God." (1 Jn 3:7-8, 10a) The general manner of life of a married Christian woman will
be characterized by a certain obedience to God in the home, a "doing well." Quite simply, those women who refuse to walk in this way of obedience as a manner of life are not to consider themselves Christians:
servants of the Lord Jesus Christ. Encouragement that one is a daughter of Abraham is not available outside this walk of obedient servanthood; it is only, "as long as
ye do well" that assurance of an eternal inheritance in Christ may be enjoyed. This walk of obedience is fundamental to God's call upon the woman; for the saintly wife whom He has begotten, it is part of the very fabric of her being.
Further, in walking
in respectful submission to your husband, you should not be dreadfully fearful or amazed, as many a lost woman might surely be in such a state… as God exhorts you, "be not afraid with any amazement." This command
strikes at the root of why so very many married women refuse to walk in the ways of God in the home: they are afraid. They are afraid that if they let go of their very stranglehold on their husbands' necks, that they themselves
will become very unhappy. Such fear is often caused by disappointments early in life that promoted a controlling spirit as a defense to further hurt. Regardless, whether a woman's fear is culturally acceptable or not, her
subjection to her husband is commanded and expected. She is also commanded to put away her fear, as Sarah did.
In being an example to other women, in giving them sound instruction to bless their homes, to understand the extent of God's commands and how far God would actually have a wife go in
this submission to a husband, in her being subject to him and honoring him when he is not obedient to God, you do well to take a good look at the example of the chaste and brave Abigail. (1 Samuel 25) We have here a very unusual
story in the Word of God, an extreme case of a pious and reverent woman submitting to a profoundly proud, foolish and arrogant man: her husband Nabal. Abigail's story is set during the days when king David was a
very young man, after he had been anointed king of Israel. It was commonly known in Israel that Saul, who still reigned as king, had outlawed David due to his jealousy concerning Samuel's prophecy that David would be the next king,
and that Saul diligently sought to slay David. Saul's persecution rendered David incapable of providing for himself and forced him to constant evasion and a dependence on foraging in the wild or on the occasional kindness of those
he chanced upon in his escapes. At one point, David encountered the herds and herdsmen of Nabal, Abigail's husband, and became a shield to his shepherds and flocks, protecting them from thieves and wild animals.
After the safe return home of Nabal's goods, David meekly asked Nabal for some provision. Instead of being generous and hospitable, Nabal was arrogant, selfish, rude, condescending, and cruel to David. This angered David so deeply
that David purposed to vindicate himself and annihilate Nabal and his entire family and community. As David was on his way toward their home to slay every male in their entire estate, from the immediate family
members to the common servants, Nabal was feasting sumptuously in celebration of the successful return of his flocks… at David's honest expense. The household servants, understanding the vulnerable strait in which they suddenly
found themselves, came to Abigail and pleaded for their very lives. It was commonly understood in their midst, as these servants conferred with Abigail about the matter, that Nabal was such a fool that no one could even begin to
speak reasonably with him about his rudeness to David. It was pointless for her to make an appeal to him. She knew what must be done. To save her life, the lives of her servants, and – yes – even her husband's own
life, Abigail hastily prepared an extravagant present of food for David and his men, and personally rode quickly out to meet him before he attacked their community. Abigail found David, in his hot displeasure, on
his way up the hill with sword in hand to slay her family, and pled with him to take out his anger on herself, owning her husband's sin before David. She understood David to be the legitimate king of Israel and she acknowledged him
as such. She stepped between David and her husband, begging David to spare the rest of the family the anticipated vengeance upon Nabal's foolishness. She pleaded with David to receive the present of food at her hand, explaining
that she understood David to be a righteous man who was being pressed unjustly by king Saul, and that she had been unaware of David's modest request for provision. She asked the Lord to protect David and his men, and to deal justly
with her husband – bringing him into judgment along with all the rest of David's enemies. This was, obviously, totally against her husband's wishes, but it was
for his own life, and for the lives of their entire family. What she said was true, and it was said to proper authority above her husband... authority that he had deeply offended. Submitting to her husband's wishes at that time would have been sinful, violating the wisdom of God in the context of the imminent and dreadful danger of their circumstance. In matters of life and death, in matters of blatant lawlessness where the husband is being deliberately careless, in such cases the rule of common sense, the Word of God and of basic divine charity prevails; one must obey God rather than men. Abigail prayerfully and reverently went before her king to ask the life of her sons, her husband and his men. She considered herself to be expendable in the matter.
Abigail fully sided with David in this situation, standing against her husband in his arrogance and sin. She did not pretend that her husband was anything other than what he had shown himself to be: a plain fool.
(vs 25) However, she remained faithful to Nabal as his wife in her spirit even in this. Also, and more importantly, she was submissive to God and His uprightness in her, though it were to her own temporal destruction. Though Abigail loathed her husband's cold-hearted foolishness, she did remain submissive to him, even in her disobedience to what she knew he wanted. After she had appeased David and saved the lives of her
loved ones, she returned to her home and told her husband everything that she had done, exactly how she had done it, and submitted herself to his hand to do as he pleased with her for her action. (vs 37!) This was
an extremely brave and upright thing for Abigail to do. The situation reveals the extreme differences between her and her husband in their character and disposition. It is plain that she was a woman of rare virtue, married to an
infidel of unusual proportions. We see in this that God, in His sovereign pleasure, at times places two people together in a marriage who are at the two extremes of human nature: one very pleasing to Him, and the other very
displeasing to Him. We also see in this example the fullness to which God would have a woman submit to a man, regardless of his wisdom or character, and how God honors this subjection, as though it were unto
Himself. This is the only example in the Word of God where a godly woman plainly dealt with an abusive and sinful man, and Abigail was properly submissive to her husband Nabal in all respects… even as he endangered the lives of an
entire community of people. She followed God's principles carefully and fully under extremely difficult circumstances, then returned to her earthly lord and submitted to his anticipated abuse, yielding to her master and awaiting
his judgment for her well-doing. Though he had apparently never been deeply abusive with Abigail to the point of justifying a divorce, it is not unreasonable to expect that he would have, at this point, brutalized her for what she
had done... had he been left to his own devices. Even so, without having any warrant to judge him so from experience, she submitted to him and trusted in God to protect her. God did protect Abigail from Nabal's
retaliation, and struck her husband dead before he could even rise from his stupor to deal with her. David heard about this a short time afterwards, and sent to take Abigail as his bride. Her virtue and wisdom were no deep secret.
She spent the rest of her days the wife of an incredible king, a man after God's own heart, nurtured in the epicenter of God's chosen people. Abigail is perhaps the most profoundly righteous woman in all of the Word
of God. There is certainly no record of any other woman called upon to deal with a situation as difficult as this, who evidenced such poise, wisdom, and perfect humility as this dear woman did in her response. If any woman has
righteously endured an unreasonable man as a husband, Abigail has. If any woman was called of God to disobey her husband's heart in righteousness, Abigail was. If any servant can be found such as this, to return to such a senseless
master after having saved his life, to humbly submit to being destroyed by him in his rage against her for having done so well, I have not seen it. It is superbly fitting that she was delivered of this fool by the hand of God, and
placed at the side of king David as his bride. Amen! Yet in all this, there was no sharpness in Abigail towards her husband. She never reprimanded him, nor did she correct him, nor did she give herself to denouncing
him to others (though she did testify truthfully and humbly concerning him before David, whom she knew to be the rightful king of Israel and a proper authority above her husband who had been deeply wronged by him, vs. 30). So shall
it be with any godly wife. Before a wife engages in conflict with her husband, or puts him in a bad light with others, she does well to consider the extreme nature of this particular instance of a wife's submission to her husband…
and think again. A situation can hardly be expected with any remotely reasonable man that will justify a contentious, disrespectful, or uncooperative spirit in his wife. Shall We Continue In Sin? Far from an unhealthy, morbid thing, it is very good for us to be here… to consider the
depth of this call for a bit. After all it is God's
call to us, not merely a human institution, an arbitrary thing. Who else calls us to meditate on this beautiful subject so bluntly and so plainly? The King of the Universe bids us in this as we seek his Holy Face, though none else be faithful here. That one living thing of "great price" to God is now sorely trampled under foot by most, but let it be cherished by us now.
Sister, the depth and degree of God's call for you in submitting to your husband is far beyond what is commonly understood today and we do well to ponder these texts thoughtfully. There is great wealth hidden in
this place, to us and to our God. To know the truth is to be set free. To disdain any portion of the Word of God, as many certainly do here, is to insult the holy origin of it and to lose the benefit intended therein. Suppose you do disdain some portion of this counsel. What are your options as a wife? What godly options are apparent that differ from what I have proposed? "Shall we continue in sin that grace may abound? God
forbid. How shall we, that are dead to sin, live any longer therein?" (Rom 6:1,2) How can a child of God consider such things? To rebel is to give place to the devil and to be taken captive by him at his will. (2 Tim 2:26) Your husband is not perfect, to be sure. Neither are you. Feminism would strip your husband of his authority in the home, and it relentlessly undermines his confidence... teaching you to stand up, resist your
husband, and take control when you do not like what is going on. If you are the dominant personality in your home, you will likely succeed if you attempt to do so. It is extremely likely that no one in the church will condemn you,
and that no one in your community or family will think the less of you. Suppose you yield to this? Should you for any reason resist your husband instead of walking in subjection to him you will grieve and anger him.
This is given. Every time you speak against your husband, every time you loose your tongue to reprimand him, to correct him, to admonish him, to contend with him... you wound him just as he would wound you if he struck you with his
fist. The wound cannot be seen, but it is just as real... and the fact that it is socially acceptable does nothing to justify or mitigate it... and rather deepens the wound than helps it to heal. What principles of
God will give you direction to resist your husband? Dare you indeed contrive some text to give you boldness here? If your husband is not demanding blatant sin, is the outcome of your rebellion against him any better for the cause
of the Lord? Even if you succeed in having your way and manipulating your husband, achieving some short-term temporal comfort, can you pretend that God is pleased in this, and that some heavenly reward awaits you for so doing? Suppose your husband is
unfaithful to you? How does your departure from him improve anyone's lot? Does it benefit your husband? your children? the church of God? Does it really even benefit you? Does it glorify the Lord? Should Sarah have left Abraham? Should Abigail have left David when he went after Bathsheba?
Even if your husband happens to strike you unjustly, would your earthly physical comfort be your primary concern? Is departing from your husband outside the bounds set by our Lord consistent with loving not your
life unto the death? of taking up your cross daily in your pursuit of Christ? of seeking first the kingdom of God and His righteousness? Have not many suffered so much more for the sake of the Lord Jesus, not accepting deliverance,
that they might obtain a better resurrection? Look down the roll call of the heroes of faith in Hebrews 11. Would you be counted among them? Or do you wish to live in carnal pleasure at God's expense? Only a
walking corpse can do such a thing. (1 Tim 5:6) In the end, looking back on your life from the bosom of Christ in eternity, would you prefer to look back with Him and hear Him say, "You were faithful unto death, I
will give you a crown of life?" (Jas 1:12, Rev 2:10) Can you truly say that resisting your husband, or leaving him, is part of your abiding in Christ, that when He shall appear you will have confidence in this and not be ashamed
before Him at His coming? (1 John 2:28) Are you willing to leave your husband... and your children too? Is your earthly comfort of more concern to you than the comfort and holiness of God? The Word of God is clear. Dear sister, your duty before God as a wife is to submit to
your husband in all things, as the Church herself submits to her Lord Jesus Christ in all things. This submission and subjection to your husband is to come from the very depths of your being; it is not a shawl to don and discard at
a whim. You are to address your husband as lord and master and confirm your obedience and the purity of your heart towards him frequently. You are to walk with him in shamefacedness and in general silence, in meekness and in
quietness, in all reverence and godly fear and subjection, honoring him and seeking his will instead of your own in all things, uplifting him and encouraging him and ministering to him as unto the Lord Jesus Christ Himself. The
children you bear are your husband's, your time is his, and your energy and strength are his. This is for all of your days, "She will do him good, and not evil, all the days of her life" (Pr 31:12), until the Lord calls one
or the other of you home. As a servant to your husband, you truly are a partaker with your husband in his work as you minister to him and uplift him, and you will likely be given to enjoy the fruits of his efforts
according as you give your life and strength to serve him. It is God's purpose to enable a godly man through the loyal strength and devotion of a godly wife, and it is generally His way that the woman should be partaker in the
results of her husband's labor and success. This will naturally occur as your husband reaps the reward of his labor. As the Church reaps the benefits of the work of her Master Jesus Christ, this principle will generally hold for
you. It applies in temporal matters as well as in spiritual matters. If your husband serves the Lord God, be confident that you are enabling the Lord's ministry through him and be joyful in that. If he be a prophet,
and you enable him in your service, you receive a prophet's reward. (Matt 10:41) If he be an evangelist, you will reap the reward of an evangelist. If a righteous man, his reward is also yours. If your husband be ungodly, yet watch
your God use your selfless service to glorify Himself in countless ways, both in your home and in your community. He will likely use your chaste and fearful manner to convert your husband to holiness and to encourage other women to
love and serve their husbands, bringing great glory to God and honor to His written Word. Even if not, be confident at least in the fact that in the last day, you will be justified and redeemed from all of the evil and abuse of
your love. No sin will go unpunished in Jesus Christ. (Col 3:25) As you yourself remain faithful to God's call to you, receive the greatest reward of all, the reward of a servant: "
He that is greatest among you, shall be your servant." (Matt 23:11) Be it in your heart to hear Him say to you, "Well done, thou good and faithful servant. Enter thou into the joy of thy Lord." (Matt 25:21) Truly, it is not merely your husband that you serve in this walk of humble service; ultimately it actually is the Lord God Himself. In this calling, as you walk therein, you serve your God to the full; you cannot
serve Him and be amiss in your duty to your husband. When you are in rebellion against your husband, you are in rebellion against your God, your eternal Husband. When you selflessly serve your earthly husband as unto the Lord God,
you do serve the Lord Jesus Christ in truth. In the end, when you enter His glorious presence having ministered to your husband in this way with your full energy and devotion, you will hear the words, as much to you as to the
Apostle Paul himself, " What will be your temporal desert for this walk of humble service? Perhaps, in truth, it does not really matter... for your true taste is for the heavenly reward as you "esteem the
reproach of Christ greater riches than the treasures of" this ol' world. (Heb 11:26) But the Word of God does indicate that there will be a rich reward for you, heavenly and earthly as you purpose to follow Him. His design is
for a reason: it is good for you, as well as for your husband. There is no instruction of God that is not designed to bring you health, peace and joy as you obey Him: "His commandments are not grievous." (1 John 5:3) "A woman that
feareth the Lord, she shall be praised… Her children arise up and call her blessed, her husband also, and he praiseth her. Give her of the fruit of her own hands and let her own works praise
her in the gates." (Pr 31:30b, 28, 31) Let us be honest with ourselves here, friends. For all of the violent rage spewing forth from feminists against this doctrine, what reasonably sane man would not nearly die to
have a daughter of Abraham by his side? "Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies?" (Pr 31:10) What would a man NOT give to find such holiness and submission and oneness in a woman? Both his arms and
legs would likely not be too high a price! Most any man, if he could ever find such a woman, would be like Jacob working for Rachel fervently for seven years to have her, and the time seemed to him, "
but a few days for the love he had for her." (Gen 29:20) She would be worth more to him than any fortune he could dream of having. It would render such a fortune needless to him, other than to please her with it – he would
already have his treasure! "Her husband... shall have no need of spoil." (Pr 31:11) Godly submission in a woman's heart captures the heart of a man as little else can. Such a woman is not only precious in
the sight of God, she is the most valued treasure a man can imagine! As a friend of mine elated to me... in one rare unforgettable glimpse into the present glory of such a marriage... a real marriage with real people... right
in my circle of acquaintance... that he simply finds himself weeping for joy as he thinks of the inward beauty of his wife... a wife that is truly in subjection to her husband as a manner of life. He literally trembles and weeps in
bewilderment at the fantastic goodness of God, finding himself utterly unworthy of such love and devotion. He cannot find ways to express it adequately! I have never heard such passion expressed anywhere else about
anything else... other than that explosive consuming passion that raptures the hearts of sold-out saints for the Lord Jesus Christ Himself. Believe you me, this blessed husband knows he has no small thing! He has found what God has
intended in His design for marriage. This is pure ecstasy... not transient and carnal, nor driven by sensual appearance and pleasure... but a joy that raptures both husband and wife into a unity and intimacy of the most profound
degree: an abiding and vibrant and living and rich and deep and fulfilling and satisfying and transcendent and pure and holy... oneness! This is impossible
apart from God's way!! This husband's eyes simply glisten with delight as he speaks of this dear woman... his own precious wife! He will do absolutely anything for her... with the kind of robust passion that inspires
bookstand fantasies... anything that is not itself a grief to his God. Why would anyone disdain this?? What man, with any trace of godliness within, would not deeply cherish, preserve
and protect such a fearfully obedient, selfless, attentive, compliant, peaceable and reverent woman? Verily, if he is a remotely reasonable man, he will boast of her in public (Pr 31: 28, 29, 31) and in private, and think of her
constantly throughout his days with thanksgiving and deep rejoicing. He will be encouraged to do his best in his work and in his service to God, and in the end will say with all sincerity, "I could never have done this without my
dear, sweet, loving wife! She is God's greatest gift to me, next to Himself!" He will be thrice the man, with such a woman as this at his side, than he would ever hope to be by himself without her. Truly, "It is not good that the
man should be alone," just as the Father said in the Garden. (Gen 2:18) God has intended to complete Man with the virtue and power of you... a dedicated woman, one who has given her life to serving her husband unconditionally and
fervently. The alluring temptation from other women will be a disgust to such a blessed man, if he has any sanity about him at all. As one blessed husband said, "Why should I steal an old Volkswagen off the street
when I have a brand new Cadillac in my garage?!" If he is a good man, instead of being tempted with wantonness, he will love you tenderly, and with the deepest passion. He will look for ways to express his love for you, unable to
contain the intensity of it, and his love will not be merely for your outward fleeting beauty, but for the exceeding treasure of your heart. Even so, your reverent submission will also move him to find your outward
appearance to be so much more attractive as the years go by… and there will be no need for the superfluity of ornaments to adorn you… though he will likely see to it that you have them aplenty. He will enjoy providing for you, and
be bolstered up to be all that His God has intended him to be through your service to him. If he is a bad man, it is likely that he will "be won by" your "chaste conversation coupled with fear," (1 Peter 3:2) and
become a good man, if you persevere in your love for Him in the power of the Holy Spirit. Truly, when a woman walks in this way of humble service to her husband, "Strength an honor are her clothing, and she shall
rejoice in time to come" (Pr 31:25). Her earthly reward will be only a diluted taste of her heavenly reward. In my opinion, the highest throngs of the saints in the heavens will have a large proportion of women among them,
blessed saints who walked in the way of holiness for the love and fear of God, fearful and silent in the mist of a crooked and perverse generation. They are oft unseen and unheard here below, but will be among the crown jewels of
the God of heaven, bursting with praise and glory before Him, exceedingly precious in His sight, borne on high of Him with joy for all to see and admire! Daughter of Abraham, it is so sad that more of our women have not found the way of holiness before God. Truly, she is a
rare beauty, a unique treasure, of great price in His sight: a virtuous woman. And by your own word and godly example... mentor other wives after you. If God calls you, as a wife, even to suffer
for His name's sake, do not deny Him; count it great a privilege: "For unto you it is given in the behalf of Christ, not only to believe on him, but also to suffer for his sake." (Phlp 1:29) "Wherefore let them that
suffer according to the will of God commit the keeping of their souls to him in well doing, as unto a faithful Creator." (1 Peter 4:19) Look for your Blessed Hope, abide in the glorious Lord Jesus Christ, and be diligent that
you may be found of Him in peace, without spot, blameless (2 Peter 3:14), confident, and unashamed (1 John 2:28) in that day. Now the truth of God rests where
it belongs: between you and your God. I trust that in you, daughter of Abraham, it does set well. "As for my people... women rule over them. O my people, they which lead thee cause thee to err, and destroy the way of thy paths." (Is 3:12) Man of God, I call on
you to take up the teaching mantle with a new purity and integrity and strength, and shun not to declare unto the church ALL the counsel of God. (Acts 20:27, Ps 40:10) Pastor or not, every man of God, every born again adult male...
is a teacher. Prove all things and hold fast that which is good. (1 Thess 5:21) Teach God's truth to your daughters, to your sons, to your wife, to your brothers and sisters in Christ. Take it to your local body in Christ, to the
elders. It is time to seek the Lord: you have found something different and unfamiliar here. I trust it is compelling. It is not
peripheral: open your mouth before the saints and speak to a more practical and relevant and precious and powerful and needful and... neglected... subject than this one! Can this be done? I think not. Be a Berean. I
beseech you: Do not walk away until you have a clean heart and a good conscience in the Holy Ghost in this matter. Soon the Son of Man will be seen in the heavens, coming to rule the nations with a rod of iron. All the tribes of the earth will wail and mourn because of Him (Matt 24:30, Rev 1:7), for their day of rebellion will be at its end. In that great and dreadful Day, the Word of God (Rev 19:13) will dash the rebel to pieces, as the vessels of the potter are broken to shivers (Rev 2:27), and He will restore His established order in His kingdom, including His order in the home. Each will have their due reward, and there will be no respect of persons. Meanwhile, sure... you will suffer for living this. So will I. Wife, husband, male, female,
pastor, elder, younger, new babe in Christ... we are all called to suffer. "Yea, and all that will live godly in Christ Jesus will suffer persecution." (2nd
Tim 3:12) It is right here, right now, that we need to lay it all down and take up our cross and follow Him. We need not imagine ourselves suffering with saints long ago, or lift up those in far away lands now persecuted for His name's sake... and feign as though are hearts are one with them, faithful... and that we would also be suffering if we did not live in such a prosperous Christian nation. The time to stand is now!! Fear not what men will do to you. He is worthy of our suffering... and of so very much more.
If you think to walk away and do nothing with this... to deliberately choose the way of silence, the way of ease, the way of darkness and shame... to let your belly be your god... and become an enemy of the cross
of Christ (Phil 3:18-19), consider this one last thought before we part: What would you not give, on your dying day, when the lights dim and your mortal life draws its last breath, as you look out into the vast reaches of eternity
and see your Lord, THE LORD GOD... coming for you, when you finally see those precious nail-pierced hands... what would you not give for one chance... one more chance... to come back to this spot right here, right now, and give it
ALL to Him? for Him... Who gave His all for you? What else do you truly have... but Him? May the God of all grace sanctify you wholly, and confirm you unto the end, working in you that which is
well pleasing in His sight, to the glory of our Lord Jesus Christ. Amen. |
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